How do you know when your marriage is over? It’s a loaded question and if you’re the person asking it, you already have a fairly good idea of where your marriage stands. Things obviously aren’t where they were on the day you two married. Perhaps you and your spouse just don’t talk as much as you used to or maybe the two of you can’t seem to communicate without a roaring argument erupting each and every time. Regardless of what’s been happening, the fact of the matter is that things aren’t in a good place. It’s very easy for a couple to overlook their marital issues and just continue down the distant and disconnected course they’re on. Burying your head in the sand in this way won’t help either you or your spouse. You both deserve more than a hollow connection. Understanding the signs that your marriage is over will help you and your partner decide whether your relationship is worth saving or whether it’s time to walk away before any more damage is done.
There are a series of warning signs that indicate when a couple is struggling seriously within their relationship. These signs include:
The goals of one spouse don’t coincide with the other. We all have our own unique idea of what our life will be like at any given point. When we marry we do so because we envision that relationship as being a fulfilling part of our life’s journey. When a person starts to view their future without consideration about how the marriage fits into the plan, things are on very shaky ground. An example is when one spouse is considering a permanent move to a new city or a career shift into a new direction. If those goals are entertained without consulting the other spouse, the marriage is clearly not at the top of that person’s priority list.
One spouse has become increasingly verbally abusive towards the other. Verbal abuse comes in many forms. For some couples it centers on one spouse constantly criticizing the other in a very derogatory way. This may be in the forms of disparaging comments about the other partner’s appearance or their choice in friends or work. Verbal abuse often occurs in arguments when one partner takes to calling their spouse names riddled with anger. If a person feels victimized verbally by their spouse it’s a very clear and serious sign that the relationship is unhealthy and emotionally dangerous.
There is no longer an emotional investment. There are obviously many crucial elements to a balanced, fulfilling and happy marriage. One key element is a strong and unwavering emotional investment in one another. You have to care deeply for your spouse as not only your life partner, but as a human being as well. If you or your spouse have become so emotionally disconnected that you no longer care whether the other is happy, that’s a sign of a marriage in very serious trouble.
Obviously, there are many more signs that are indicative of a marriage that has hit a crisis point. If you’re still unsure whether you and your spouse are simply going through a rough patch or if your marriage is racing towards divorce, consider the state of your connection now as compared to several months or years ago. If there’s a noticeable difference in a negative sense, that’s a clear sign that you and your spouse need to address the problems you are facing now. Ignoring a marriage that is free falling towards destruction will not remedy it. It’s time to work with your spouse to decide together what your next step will be.
Many marriages go through an incredibly difficult time. It’s up to you and your spouse whether you want to end the relationship or save your marriage from divorce.
You can rebuild the connection you two once share so it’s stronger than it’s ever been. There is a guaranteed way to save your marriage.